Love, Abuse and Weinstein, et al

I just reread my three-part post on abuse (March 2015) and what might be the beginning baby steps from humanity to inhumanity. My thoughts on the subject are today what they were then: placing too much emphasis on the differences between men and women does not serve either and opens the door to justified abuse.

It’s nice to balance an intense subject like depravity with visions and reminders that life can be beautiful and magical, as it is with me when I’m with my horses. Problems always waft away when I’m with them. Bazan is still my dream horse. And while Miata is no longer with us in form, she lives in my heart.

Having grown up around the entertainment industry (Mother was a showgirl and actress), revelations about Harvey Weinstein’s treatment of women was not a huge surprise.  More troubling though is how many others knew about what he was doing and not only did nothing about it, but gave overt and/or tacit support of his depraved behavior.

To reiterate from my earlier post: the beginnings of abuse start with believing that we are defined as individuals, not by our spiritual core, but by our outward and material differences. And that we feel somehow justified in abusing anyone or anything (animals included) who is a non-me–not of my club, group, religion, skin color, political party, country, gender. Somehow it’s okay to do harm to a non-me.

When you consider that people are, first and foremost, spiritual entities (soul, spirit, cosmic consciousness, etc.)–and that underneath it all, we all have the capacity to experience fear, goals, desires, emotions, regrets, and love–we simply are not as inclined to do harm to another if we consider that person to be a fellow me.

In terms of changing attitudes and behavior, the biggest barrier I see at this time is that when one person (let’s call him Joe) has violated his or her own personal integrity at the expense of another, any attempt or action by Joe to discipline another person, (let’s call him Sam), raises the possibility, even in the mind, that Joe’s own transgressions might be exposed in the process. I takes real courage to call out someone who’s done something unethical if in so doing, light may be shed on oneself!

Of course, ultimately, the only way out of this mess is to have the courage to face up to what one has done and take action to correct one’s own faults knowing that the truth will ultimately set one free.

None of us is perfect. We’ve all done things which we later regret. But it’s a slippery slope when one first breaks faith with his fellows thus leaving oneself vulnerable to blackmail and a continuation of hiding, all neatly justified and   submerged so that one can live with oneself. All of this is, of course, compounded when it is made so blatantly clear that it is not safe to communicate! (More on that subject in an upcoming post!)

Funny, but whenever a person confesses, rarely is the fall-out as bad as what that person imagined. People, on the whole, are very forgiving; it’s in their basic nature. Confession is, indeed, good for the soul!

I am hoping that those in the entertainment industry who have slipped on that slope, will take stock of their own basic goodness and have the courage to take responsibility for their actions, seeking to correct them; but also to not shrink from correcting those who would refuse to take responsibility on their own. When personal integrity falls short, justice follows.

Yours in love,

Tanii