Love Exponential (Part One)

In my conversations with people, a routine question that comes up is the importance of knowing—and liking—yourself as a fundamental step in finding a healthy, loving and lasting relationship.

While that is true—and something I stress—at what point do you know yourself well enough to feel confident that your choice of a mate today will reflect who you become in the future?

 

 

Do we not evolve and grow over time? Do we not discover things about ourselves to take us to new heights? Might our needs and desires change? For that matter, might experiences “teach us” that we are no match for what life throws at us, causing us to become less than what we once were? Would our choice of a mate today be the same choice of mate for our future selves?

Again, the question becomes: At what point do you know yourself well enough to feel confident in your choice of a life-partner and creating a relationship that will stand the test of time?

 

My cat, Milo, demonstrating a little too much self-reflection.

 

My book’s subtitle reads, in part, that I found happiness “without being completed sane!” What I mean by that is you don’t have to be perfect and have everything in life all worked out. You may still be wondering what you want to be when you grow up (even in your 40s, 50s, 60s and beyond). But you should have worked out your core values: how you treat people; things that are important to you, philosophically, spiritually, politically; a general sense of your passions and interests; a general sense of professional direction; lifestyle and goals.

Even with all those things in place, there is no 100% guarantee that your choice today will result in a happily-ever-after. After all, life happens when you are doing something else. However, there are key issues which can greatly improve your chances for long-term success.

Stay tuned! For a list of those key issues, check out my next post!