Joan Rivers RIP

In 1977, I got hired to play a small part in Joan River’s movie, Rabbit Test. Most actors worry about ending up on the cutting room floor (showbiz-speak that means you may get paid for acting, but your part might get cut out of the movie before it hits theaters).

Me in 1976. Joan loved the braces so I got the part! I was 34 at the time, working for KABC-TV. Everyone thought I was brave for wearing metal in my mouth at a TV studio where image is everything!

My situation was just the opposite. After the movie was made, I ran into Joan at KABC-TV in L.A. where she was promoting the film on The Morning Show with Regis Philbin and Sarah Purcell. En route to the show’s studio, she saw me and announced, “You’re going to be on TV this morning!” My response: a stupefied, “What?!” It turns out that the two scenes I was in were the scenes she was using to promote the movie on television shows all over the country!

I wish I could tell you that my acting chops and comedic delivery were the reasons she had chosen those two scenes, but I’d be lying. No, the movie’s real star was a young and very talented Billy Crystal (Joan knew talent when she saw it). I simply helped him drag a pregnant woman across the floor (you’ll have to see the movie to know what I’m talking about).

Shortly after the film was released in 1978, I had occasion to work as Joan’s personal assistant while her main assistant, my sister-in-law, Barbara, was on vacation with her husband/my brother, Mark. She had an office in her beautiful and very large home in Beverly Hills. It was a wonderful experience because I got to see Joan in a way that the public rarely does—up close and personal. At least that was the case before reality TV, and even then I’m not so sure that there aren’t still very private moments between her and her daughter, Melissa, that are strictly between them.

When I worked for Joan, her husband Edgar was still alive and Melissa was eight.  Barbara and I recently talked about our respective experiences with Joan, which I share with you now:

Joan was a consummate professional who worked hard at her craft. She had a file drawer built into one wall of her office filled with 3×5 cards, each one with a joke, referenced and cross-referenced by subject matter. She was always making notes on joke ideas for the file, but she also got jokes from people from around the country. She tried out new material at a club in Beverly Hills and honed that material until it got the desired laughs. She made it look easy because she was passionate about making people laugh, but also because she worked very hard at making it look easy–the true mark of a professional in any field, no less comedy.

Joan and Edgar were a team, a private and close relationship wherein they shared both personal and professional goals. They were each other’s sounding board and support. Their personalities were at opposite ends of the spectrum, which appeared to suit them both. She had such an outgoing and in-your-face personality while he epitomized the conservative Brit. They had British friends and I believe Joan delighted in all the upper-crust sociability and formality; perhaps she enjoyed being on the receiving end of being entertained by the contrast in cultures.

They were devoted parents. Even though they had household staff, including a governess, it was Joan and Edgar who picked Melissa up at school every day. They also were hands-on when it came to parent/teacher conferences, Girl Scouts, and other events in the life of their daughter.

Both Joan and Edgar were well educated and read a lot. I had occasion to be in their bedroom once and was struck by all the books stacked up on the end tables that flanked their very large king-sized bed that sported pillows propped up suitable for reading.

They both understood business and how to manage money, and they understood the business of comedy. It was, therefore, devastating when Rabbit Test, in which they had invested heavily, failed at the box office. Based on my experience with them—and from conversations with Barbara—I can imagine the sense of failure they must have endured.

Joan was very generous and loyal. Many of her staff then, and I suspect subsequently, had been with her for many years. Long after Barbara had left her employ, Joan would give complimentary tickets to her and Mark to her shows in Las Vegas. She had a “gift closet.” Barbara recalls that when Joan was going somewhere—to see friends or do a TV show—she’d go to the closet and pull out a gift, already wrapped, for that person. Once Barbara remarked that she thought a particular gift was beautiful, whereupon Joan gave it to her!

In my view, Joan and Edgar’s marriage stands as an example of a great relationship, based on love and respect that worked and helped them fulfill individual and mutual goals, both personal and professional. After almost 28 years together, Charley and I have that sort of mutually rewarding and loving relationship. Though I was not married to Charley at the time, I believe that Joan would have approved of my choice in a soul-mate.

RIP Joan.

Yours in love,

Tanii