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Introduction
It was Saturday, January 31st. All I wanted him to do was help me load a heavy chair from my garage into a borrowed truck. Simple. I was 45; he had just turned 29. The following Friday we decided to get married and did so three weeks later, exactly four weeks after that fateful Saturday when my life changed forever.
On February 28, 2013, we celebrated our 26th anniversary. He still thinks I’m eye candy and I still think he’s the sexiest, most wonderful man in the world.
I know exactly what I did to go from twice-divorced and miserable to meeting the man of my dreams in a few short weeks. What I did is the subject of this blog and my book, “Ten Weeks to Love.”
I Fell in Love with Charley Because…..
Wow! There are so many reasons!
I will devote separate blog posts to each reason starting with this: He spoke well of his ex-wife. He was honest with me about why they broke up, but never disrespectful of her in his conversations on the subject. In fact, he praised her intelligence, her friendship, and what a terrific mom she was with Simon and Amy who were age four and two respectively at the time we got married in 1987.
Boy do we look goofy! Charley, me, Mary Kay and Simon trying out the camera in my new computer (December 2012). This is NOT a photo for posterity!
Valentine’s Day—Raising the Bar on Standards
When you accept lower standards in your relationships, you seal your fate. I know first-hand.
Charley and I have been spending the last few days—including today, Valentine’s Day—building a piece of furniture for Charley’s office. And while it’s for his office, I love helping him create it. In my last marriage, this sort of jointly created activity just never seemed to happen. When I look back at all the years that this unhappy relationship was acceptable to me, I shudder. It is not a compliment to me that I felt that this was the best I could do.
Look at those rabbit ears! Charley and me having big fun at our ranch in Utah. My garage was 1,500 sq. ft., bigger than the house we moved into when we returned to California.
The Road (Less Traveled) to Love
The most frequently asked question I get, hands down, is “Where can I go to meet people?” This is usually followed by comments about all the places and websites the person asking the question has gone to without success.
Charley and I met when he was the photographer for a graphics design studio that was doing work for me. The first time we actually had a conversation more than “hi,” was when he helped me lift a heavy chair onto a borrowed truck and then helped me deliver it to a garage sale 20 miles away.
Photo: Charley, me and Milo with Cesar Millan at the ranch.
Pinch Me! Ouch! Do it Again!
I do have to pinch myself regularly to make me realize—yet again—how very fortunate I am to have met and married my wonderful husband Charley. On February 28, we will celebrate our 26th wedding anniversary. Aside from the fact that the time has gone by rather quickly, that time is full of grand and exciting, meaningful and memorable experiences.
It is not that life has been easy these many years; we have had our adventures! But I have to pinch myself (there I go again!) at how well we figured things out together. Frankly, there’s not much that has happened over the past 26 years that doesn’t make me smile, inwardly if not outwardly. Or make me laugh, which I like even better.
Photo: Charley on a photo safari with friend and fellow photographer Christine Murphy.
Love and the House That’s for Sale
There is an old adage in real estate that you make your money when you purchase a property, not at the end of the deal when you sell it. For those of you not in real estate, that means how much return on your investment you get back depends on how well you bought in the first place.
Similarly, when it comes to love, the long-term success of your relationship—and a return on your emotional investment—depends on how well you selected your mate in the first place.
Photo: Son Josh and wife Eve, awesome couple!